you stole my past and future... now is all the time i have!

hi welcome to my page of crying over asch, i actually have 2 love mails written for him and you can find the first here. but anyway let's get this show on the road, please know there are spoilers! (last edit: 8/1/19)

good evening twitter this is ur girl izzy, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, i cried so hard over asch the bloody that i can’t even feel my face anymore
in other words hello welcome to my mess of emotions regarding this boy! i’ve written countless rants and lovemails for him so i decided, why not make a huge one. this is my 2nd huge lovemail i’ve written so if you’ve already read my first one, get ready for a bigger mess of emotions in this one :D

so to begin with.. i really can not express my love for asch because there’s SO many ways i can describe him. i got tota for the 3ds in late december and finished it in january this year. i thought my love for him peaked there, but i was so wrong. i found SO many more reasons to love him since then. so let’s dive into my whole adventure of loving him…
january 2018 was when i first got into abyss and found asch. i actually first found him in tales of link in his yukata outfit; i thought he seemed cool but i didn’t really look into him after that, until i watched abyss’s anime. when i got to his debut scene the first thing that caught my eye was his character design. i thought his green eyes were absolutely beautiful, and the fact he looked like luke got me hooked right away. as i kept watching i got more and more excited to see him, this mysterious guy who looks like the protagonist and probably has a huge impact on the story. leading onto when i learned his backstory, that’s when i knew asch was going to be my favorite because i’m such a sucker for characters with sad backstories. many people dislike asch because at first he tries to kill luke and seems really harsh and cold, but his past is responsible for that. even i disliked him at one point, before i even got to learn more about him. imagine losing everything to you- your parents, home, even your fiancé. that’s what asch had to go through when he was 10. yes when he was 10 he was betrayed by someone he thought he could trust and put in a cell where no one could find him. the fact that this happened and that he had forbidden experiments done on him made me really upset. he eventually got out of the cell and tried to return home, but was so devastated by this replica taking over his life. van manipulated asch into joining him and told him he was needed, and that he had no place in his family anymore. the reason he’s so cold towards people is because of what van told him...and he forgot all about his past because of that. to quote asch, “during the seven years of my abduction, the luke inside of me died”. after all of this i felt so horrible for him, and was able to finally see what shaped asch to be the man he is.

despite saying he’s abandoned his past, asch learns that your past actually never goes away. it’s the reason why you’re the way you are today, and asch finally embraces his past and puts hope into the future. that source of hope to me, is no other than natalia. when asch meets natalia again for the first time in years, he wishes that he could just forget her. this is because he knows he’ll never be able to return to her, although he still loves her very much... i love this about asch because he soon finds the strength to overcome his past and doesn’t forget about his fiancée. he’s one of the strongest characters I’ve met and I’m very proud of him. one of the saddest moments for me was at the ending, when he’s about to die he says he feels fine. he says he still has people he can protect, and when he dies it will be for the person he loves. when asch found out he was slowly dying due to fonon separation, he fought as hard as he could because he didn’t know how much time he had left. this meant he never took care of his wounds, one big one being from van. and when he went to chase him down asch ended up passing out because his wound was that bad. that breaks my heart so much because he’s putting himself in more pain than he’s gone through already...adding onto the fonon separation, even if asch made it out of eldrant he probably would've died. ~~this is why i resort to dacha games where he can be happy~~ but overall pleake take care of yourself sir
while asch makes me very sad regarding his story, I’ll talk about how him and natalia make me so happy. asch cares for her so much that when he finds out natalia is captured he literally FLIPS HIS CHAIR OVER and goes to save her as fast as he can. asch also gives her the courage she needed badly at sheridan. he tells her it doesn’t matter if she’s of royal blood or not, and that she is what truly makes a princess. he makes her cry but in a good way because she’s so happy he gave her the encouragement and that makes me so soft…. in his manga asch also says as long as natalia is healthy then he has no complaints. from the time they reunited in the rain to working together to stop van, I feel like asch’s love for natalia slowly came back to him and that made me so happy. he went from "i'm not the person you once knew" to literally bursting out of a bar to save her. asch isn’t entirely cold and harsh and some people just fail to recognize that. when he’s surrounded by those he cares about he becomes so kind and warm-hearted towards them, which is sadly not very often. so to sum asch’s story up it’s very sad but beautiful to watch play out throughout the game, and how it affects him as a person overall. there’s no doubt that asch’s story is one of my favorites among all my favorite characters which is like...over 20 lol.

not only do I appreciate his story, but his design is something that makes asch the character I love today. i love his long hair and seeing it in different styles such as braids, ponytails and others. dark red is also such a gorgeous color and it pairs so well with his emerald colored eyes. his outfit design is also very intricate and I think it suits him very well! his voice actors are also very talented—i’m used to hearing him in japanese but ever since I played abyss in english I’ve come to appreciate his English voice as well. he has the same voice actor as Luke so hearing him with a deeper voice is like, “holy shit” I REALLY LIKE HIS VOICE OKAY… I’ve listened to his jp voice actor sing and it is so beautiful..chihiro suzuki is a god! asch’s fighting style is also one of my favorites, I main characters that use a sword and a few spells so asch fits that perfectly. his spells are super neat like icicle rain and explosion, and his regular attacks are super strong as well. (although his stats suck ass at mushroom road I still love him) and speaking of fights, the fights you have with asch in the game are at such important points in the game. the yulia city one is started from anger and hatred of revealing the replica situation, and the eldrant one is started to see which one of them was better. let me tell you asch has kicked my ass many times while playing and I had to run around in circles for both fights chsknfdhbut I won eventually. asch also joins your party a max of 3 times in the game and he’s willing to cooperate to help everyone out for a bit. I see this as asch slowly becoming less of the evil figure people see him as because fun fact: the god general you fight the least is asch. you fight all the others at least 3 times and asch is only 2. so YEAH asch isn’t the scary villain you think he is at first sight, he is actually a good guy and I love him very much..

i love how tales gacha games portray asch to be in a much happier life, for example him entering an eating contest in link and celebrating valentines with natalia. in abyss they can’t quite do that for obvious reasons, being that van and his subordinates can track down asch, or he can be spotted easily and attacked if spotted with the main party. when asch finally got to experience a valentine’s day AND white day it made me one of the happiest people ever because he seemed like he actually enjoyed it? and who knows when the last time he properly celebrated those days were...i’m happy for him. going back to asch’s love for natalia, he goes to a workshop to make a homemade ring for her on white day. no, he doesn’t go out and buy her a present with money and call it a day. he takes the time to make something homemade and tells her he’s so grateful for her and all she’s done. because flashback to the valentine’s event natalia said she was making chocolate for everyone but she was originally planning to make it just for asch. asch ended up eating her chocolate, even though he knew he was gonna get sick from it AND he avoided using a medication that would prevent him from getting sick. i think this really shows how far he’ll go for her because even though he knows how bad natalia’s cooking is, he assures her that he’ll happily eat her cooking anytime. kancskcnsk I’M SUCH A MESS FOR THESE TWO HONESTLY just kill me already...moving into a different game, asteria gave him an orchestra unit and I almost cried because I never imagined him being in one. i’m in orchestra as well so this meant a lot to me and his art was absolutely gorgeous. his voice lines were also so cute, ranging from talking about the other performers practicing to talking about his own piano playing. bamco i wish we could’ve actually heard him play but IT’S OKAY i’m sure he plays beautifully anyway because asch is Just Like That. finally going back to link, asch said he wasn’t going to enter an eating contest because it had octopus and he hates octopus. but when jade told him natalia helped to prepare the contest he ZOOMED over there so fast it was so great. and I think he ate like. fuckin 370+ takoyakis?? he ended up passing out. he’s so stupid but he does it for natalia and i love him for that. while i’m talking about gacha games ASCH ALWAYS COMES HOME FOR ME??? i got a new asteria account in September last year and got his 6 star unit, and a month later he had his orchestra unit released. I spent sooo many hours and orbs trying to get him, and around 170+ stones in or so he came home!!! i practically cried because he doesn’t get new content often so thank u sir. in rays he finally became a playable character in june last year, and I was absolutely thrilled. I wanted him in the game ever since I met him and I had around 8 pulls for his mirrage? he came home on the 2nd to last pull and I cried at like 2am so thank u sir again! FINALLY in March this year my boy got his seasonal mirrage!! and I got him ON THE FIRST PULL!!! I cried at 2am again but. it was worth waking up super early. summer 2019 he came home three times in a row, i was so blessed he’s also the only character I have in rays with a maxed out affinity level and character level…yeah this boy really does mean so much to me ADKFNDKFJ

so overall I love asch so much because he’s proven to be a huge comfort me over the past year. at some point I was embarrassed to have him as a favorite because I felt like people would be upset I didn’t talk about sorey anymore. i love sorey and all but I feel like I can talk about asch so much more. he definitely has more depth to his character and I continue to find reasons to love him each and every day. when i was facing hard times last year around august, october and november, i found asch to be a really big comfort character for me. i can’t quite explain it but seeing him makes me so warm inside and I just really enjoy talking about him to others. i’ve gotten some people to like him more, or aschtalia more and that makes me truly happy; i really do want others to know that asch is a wonderful guy and has so much more to him than being the cold man that had his life taken away. he really does deserve happiness. colette says he looks like someone that looks like he’s searching for happiness and that made my heart HURT!! bamco let him be happy please and thank you.
if you’ve read this far, thank you so so much i owe you my life. i am truly grateful to have met such a beautifully written character who’s made me a happier person. asch has made me happy, sad, upset, cry and laugh he is So Powerful. he's also one of the main reasons why i went back to writing and i just love writing about him..
asch has existed for 13 years, and although I wasn’t there for much of that time i’m glad to have known him for at least 1! i’ve met so many nice people who love him as well and create amazing content for him so shout-out to you guys. another shout-out to my friends for making me content for him; art, edits, memes etc. even if they’re small i cherish them all so much!!!

thank you asch, for being one of my all time favorites and having an impact on my life..I hope I can continue to love you for many more years and grow my love for you even more <3

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if ur reading this please know there will be spoilers!! (january 2019)

good evening twitter this is ur girl izzy and i'm here to talk about how much this redhead means to me!!! seriously though i can never find the right words to describe my love for asch because he's Just That good. i'll start off when i first discovered him- it's quite hard to remember but i was playing tales of link and i remember summoning a red haired boy.. i didn't really pay him much attention because i wasn't into much tales games at the time. however i picked up the abyss anime soon enough and i learnt he was there!! i didn't get to him in the anime until a few days later and his debut scene came on and i... perhaps i died? first thing i loved about him was his character design, i happen to have a lot of green eyed favs so seeing him with them made me <3 <3 i was also interested because you know. he looked like luke. so i kept watching and when he came on screen again i was so excited because i got to learn more about him. i learnt that he was a cold-hearted character, a trait not much of my tales favorites shared. i started to dislike him because of that and the fact that he was rude to luke and all but that changed a lot when i learnt why he's like that. some people may go "i don't like asch because he's annoying/rude" well he has reason for being so. moving on, something that really made me love asch was his backstory because i have a soft spot for characters like him. having his life taken away from him.. meaning his beloved family, home, fiance and role as prince. taken away by a simple clone of him, who he finally got to meet after years of isolation. of course i felt horrible for him so i disliked him less after that, and learnt he's actually not a bad guy. he's considered an antagonist because of his position as a god general but his actions paint him to be the opposite. you even get to play as him/have him in your party in the game, meaning he's willing to cooperate, and later ends up helping luke- the replica he despised. trailing off, something else i love about asch is that he has such a soft side but it shows rarely...and some people don't notice it. like in one of the drama cd's asch runs into luke and the party trying to win this so-called "famous" cooking equipment..asch learnt natalia really wanted it so he says he'll give the game a shot, mainly because he wanted to give it to natalia!!! he's also soft when he smiles which he somehow forgets to do. asch is considered "the kind of person who's been searching very hard for happiness" in a skit with colette, and that makes me quite emotional because asch deserves happiness, something he's not really given in the game. thankfully he's portrayed in a happier life in mobile games like rays and asteria (everyone say thank you bamco).

i love how hardworking asch is, to the point where he keeps going even though he's injured or close to death. he searched so hard for the jewel of lorelei that he visited every sepiroth. he got rejected by his home but kept moving on. he got hit by van's sword and started bleeding, quickly saying "i'm fine" and "i don't need healing". you can tell asch doesn't really care what happens to himself anymore, as long as he succeeds in his goals and that makes me upset because he doesn't deserve more pain than he's already gotten :( but overall that's just the kind of person he is; leading to his overall personality, he holds a lot of pride and carries a strong love for his country. it's shown when he promises with natalia that they'll change the country to be better- so that war never happens, so that no one has to be poor. i love him for that and i'm sad that he didn't get to see that promise through until the very end. thanks abyss for making him so sad :')
another major part i love about asch is his character design, which i mentioned earlier. i found his long hair attractive and red was a hair color not many of my favorites had. so now he's the only red haired fav i have lol!! i also thought his outfit was neat, with the the unique design of a heart of red that matches his hair. to be honest i love all the outfits he's been given, from his viscount uniform to his swimsuit and to his yukata, i think they're all so great. while on the topic of outfits i am so so so grateful for asteria giving him an orchestra outfit, it's close to how i imagined it'd be...and they gave him a braid!!!! he can probably rock any hairstyle but the braid...it's so gorgeous. finally his voice actor (chihiro suzuki) was one that i've begun to like a lot. he voices kisumi in free so i was expecting a higher pitched voice (which luke has instead) but instead asch got a really deep voice and i was so shocked because. i was so used to suzuki's high pitch but hearing the lower one made asch perfect!!! i've come across some songs by him, very few having his deep voice but they sounded amazing. i like looking into seiyuus and their different roles so it was definitely neat haha
this brings me to something i'd expect to never happen: asch always come home in the tales mobage i have!!! i summoned his mirage and 5 star weapon in rays over summer, received a new asteria account with his initial 6 star, and even got his orchestra 6 star!!! it was only his second gacha 6 star so i really wanted him to add to my collection and what do you know he came home. i was so happy because i spent hours grinding asteria just for this one boy and he heard me crying for him to come home ggggg so. thank you asch i hope you continue to keep on coming home <3
one of my favorite memories was finally getting his manga!! i looked for it for months and i finally found one for cheap around my birthday so it was a nice present! and it's heavily focused on him so i was like oh hell yeah. they made him so beautiful in his manga and i reread it often because it's really interesting.. you get to see the different sides of him that people don't usually see and i think that's really important. for example he wishes he forgot his past because when he saw natalia for the first time in ages you can tell he was full of despair because he'll never return to her, and overall won't ever return to his old life because he no longer cares anymore. i'm sure that if things ever got better for him and he got to live longer to see van's defeat, he'd at least try to regain his life that he used to cherish so much. maybe even finally marry natalia and become the prince ~~but we can't have nice things.~~ that's something i also find sad about asch's character, you can tell he still holds on to his memories with natalia because he saves her in the cavern, assists her during the journey, and even recites the promise they made when they were younger.. natalia didn't expect that because asch said their bonds are now in the past, but telling her those words gave her the courage to face her father and keep the party's journey moving. so there's still a part of asch that loves natalia and it's why they're one of my favorite ships today!!

so overall you're probably wondering why i love asch so much, well it's mostly because he's a really big comfort for me and his overall story is so important in abyss. if he never existed then luke would've never been born, the world wouldn't have been saved and he would've died at azkeriuth as the original luke. as i said earlier asch also helped out a lot in the storyline, he shared his power with luke when he wasn't strong enough and saved the party from van and the god generals at various times. he's also the god general who attacked them the least- he still has his outbursts from being mad at luke and stuff but you only fight asch twice (solo fighting with luke) while you fight the generals more. while some people might be like "oh yay i don't have to fight this guy a lot", that is good (his fights are a pain) but i also see it as asch slowly becoming a good guy!! he's my favorite god general (what did u expect) and seeing his interactions with the generals makes me laugh because they all treat him like a kid because he keeps doing stuff he shouldn't and gets mad way too quickly which is also really funny i make fun of him sometimes saying he needs anger management and stuff ASFJGH.. you'll see me make fun of him a lot and hate on him but really i love him he's my favorite dumb redhead. i love analyzing his character because of all the different content he gets. like in tales of asteria he had a comic where someone wanted to talk to him but he didn't know them (they thought he was luke) so asch just rolled along with it...please give this guy some friends. tales of homeroom did that and i was so happy because he was considered a senpai by someone and I WAS SO SOFT!!!! and he looked genuinely happy and helped some people out it was so great. ~~i still haven't watched the episode because it costs money...bamco please release the episodes in the future i would literally die~~
thank you if you read this far...hopefully you can now see why i adore this boy so much!!! it's crazy how i chose my fav to be such an angry boy ~~gremlin~~ who shouts REPLICA and DRECK way too much. not to be dramatic but i'd give him my life. he's done so much for me. i met a lot of friends through him and abyss in general. he's also made me a happier person and was a really big comfort during bad times. the past year knowing him was such an adventure, although he's existed for 10+ years i'm glad to known him for at least one! again he's just. so special and great and [insert every positive adjective here]. i absolutely love talking about him...i could go on and on because my love for him runs endlessly!!! again thank you for reading i really appreciate it! i don't character claim asch at all and if you love him as well i'm sure we'd be good friends! i suck at ending these but uhhh thank you asch, i hope i can continue loving you for many more years to come♡

also since you scrolled this far...take these soft images I cry at daily